Dear Friends and Family,

It’s been awhile since I have posted on my blog. I was sick for a week, and we have had a big trial. I won’t share my trial, but I will tell you we DID NOT get what we prayed for with all our hearts. What I want to share with you is that as hard as I have cried and begged for my will, it did not happen; but I still have faith that he sees the whole picture. I have relearned that a testimony cannot be based on miracle’s giving us when we want them. What we may see as a trial, maybe a way of directing us down a new path. Through tears I know that it is important to not lose sight of being grateful for what you do have. This experience has helped me relate to several people in the scriptures. I understood a little the rebellion of Laman, and Lemuel. I left my home, family, friends; and I still didn’t get my way! I understood why Sariah, for a time doubted if Heavenly Father was really there. Sunday, as we were in the middle of our learning experience, we heard a talk on gratitude. I thought about people I had tried to help, and it was met with critizem and an ungrateful heart. I wondered if that was how Heavenly Father felt. I realized it is important to see our blessings in the middle of our trials. I like Sariah needed to repent, and change my attitude. I understood Nephi, and said to myself, “I, Ginger, having been born of goodly parents…having seen many afflictions in the course of my days, nevertheless, having been highly favored of the Lord in all my days”. I remember sitting through a lesson once where the teacher said,” If we have enough faith we can move mountains”. Just having gone through fighting cancer with Jared, my views had understood that concept a little better. Yes, with faith we can move mountains, or witness our child’s life being speared. However, we have to be willing to except God will. Otherwise there would be no mountains between Nauvoo, and Salt Lake City. The way would have had good weather, mana along the path, and no mountains. The Saints had a lot more faith than I do. A loving Heavenly Father was building a bases for his gospel. The saints needed to gain understanding and strength. I can be like a spoiled child wanting my way NOW! Sometimes we don’t know why, we don’t see the whole picture. All we see and want is our short vision. I want you all to know that I know the Church is true, not just when Heavenly Father blesses my life with miracles, but in my stormy days also. I know he’ll forgive me, after I rebel because I couldn’t move the mountain (even though I had faith). What we may see as a road block, maybe a loving Father redirecting us on to safer path. A path that will teach us lessons we need to learn. It will give someone a chance to offer service to us. We are grateful we are here, and we know our Heavenly Father love us. He like a loving father may not give us what we want, but he will give us what we need. He will teach us what we need to learn. Last night we went to Family Home Evening, expecting our two to show up. We were delighted to have five. At the end of Elder Hawks lisson we were able to assign someone else to take charge of FHE next week. We had a great discussion, and the best FHE ever! We love and miss you all!

Sister Hawks